weeks 13 & 14

week 13 was a giant tease.
here, feel pretty decent for three days in a row and then go back to throwing up every day. also i somehow tweaked my back in the same place i sprained it last spring, which put a super fun twist on everything.

kneel over the toilet retching. OUCH MY NECK! OH MY BACK! puke, puke, puke, body convulsing uncontrollably. SHOOTING PAINS. then travis saying, "that looked really painful!"

haha.

thank goodness that week is over!!!

also, travis was at the station on halloween, so i hung out with my family and hit up his family's halloween party. luckily halloween is my least favorite holiday, or maybe a tie with new year's, but anyway, i wasn't too chuffed about it being low key.


this last week was week 14. most amazing week of my entire life.

started getting some energy back.
started feeling SO much better. still queasy at some points during the day, but NOTHING like before.
started exercising again. starting slowly, but better than nothing, right?
started being able to eat more foods, like clementines, bananas, oatmeal, pretzels, and even some rice and beans from red iguana! still can't eat meat, but i'll take what i can get.
started being slightly less sensitive to smells, which meant i could burn my cranberry mandarin candle!
had a doctor's appointment, which was awful and scary and had me crying through the entire thing. no worries, baby is great, i'm just afraid of my vagina. this dr. appointment requires its own post.

one thing i will never do again, is take my good health for granted.

the day before it snowed 34523 inches, (which was so exciting!) i took a walk around daybreak. the sky was so blue, the trees were so colorful, and the feel of sun on my face was intoxicating. i had my pandora feist/hem station playing in my headphones. and the wonderfulness of the moment, that i was outside, walking around, feeling good, it all just hit me. and i cried and cried. (i was glad i was wearing sunglasses, because there were other people out walking and i didn't need a scene.) that moment was a good one.

then, a few days later i was able to go back to the gym. another emotional moment for me. (don't worry, i kept the crying in check this time.) walking through those doors was like remembering myself, a person who was strong, not the sniveling, puke mess i have been the past several months. going back to the gym was a little like coming home. it's the same gym i started going to when i was so homesick for hawaii, the place that helped me lose 35 pounds, and also shed emotional baggage, the place i went the day before getting married, the place that was there for me when marriage was scary and i was unsure of everything else besides what was inside that gym. going back after my longest absence in almost three years, was incredible.

decked out in gym attire that still fits but is stretching a bit. 

anyway, the second trimester so far is much improved from the first. 

we find out if baby bean is a girl or a boy in three weeks! 

and i felt him/her move this morning! felt like really exaggerated butterflies in there for a split second and then it was gone. so crazy. 

happy new week everyone! thanks for all the love and support through everything. 

xo