i like to think im not the kind of girl who flies by the seat of her pants.
i like to think i have life plans and stick to them. follow them through.
oh wait. recap of life's bigger decisions lately.
maybe ill go to SUU. graduate and teach there. no wait.
move to hawaii. never planned that one. just applied for funsies.
hmmm oh ok move there even though i don't know anyone
or anything really.
oh ok ill stay there, graduate, teach brown kids, marry a brown guy, stick around.
go home for the summer to work. fully plan on going back.
reserve housing. make a class schedule.
oh no, wait i better stay in utah. even though my plane leaves
in three days.
ill go to the U of U. linguistics? sure, sounds good.
travis bodtcher? didn't we go to high school together? oh hi let's date.
marriage? nope i don't like that at all.
oh wait am i married now? wait that wasn't part of my plan...
kids. ill wait. no no really. im not ready.
so i peed on a stick this morning and well...
hahahah tricked you! don't worry. it's all good and empty wombwise.
but i did change my mind about the U of U.
school starts tomorrow but i won't be on the train or in class.
im going to massage school in oct. :) go ahead. judge me. ill finish school after im a massage therapist and have a better idea of what i want to do.
but honestly i keep doing all the things i never set out to do.
and im so darn happy. :)
i like to think i have life plans and stick to them. follow them through.
oh wait. recap of life's bigger decisions lately.
maybe ill go to SUU. graduate and teach there. no wait.
move to hawaii. never planned that one. just applied for funsies.
hmmm oh ok move there even though i don't know anyone
or anything really.
oh ok ill stay there, graduate, teach brown kids, marry a brown guy, stick around.
go home for the summer to work. fully plan on going back.
reserve housing. make a class schedule.
oh no, wait i better stay in utah. even though my plane leaves
in three days.
ill go to the U of U. linguistics? sure, sounds good.
travis bodtcher? didn't we go to high school together? oh hi let's date.
marriage? nope i don't like that at all.
oh wait am i married now? wait that wasn't part of my plan...
kids. ill wait. no no really. im not ready.
so i peed on a stick this morning and well...
hahahah tricked you! don't worry. it's all good and empty wombwise.
but i did change my mind about the U of U.
school starts tomorrow but i won't be on the train or in class.
im going to massage school in oct. :) go ahead. judge me. ill finish school after im a massage therapist and have a better idea of what i want to do.
but honestly i keep doing all the things i never set out to do.
and im so darn happy. :)
i am proud of you. i have a feeling you will love massage school and you will be brilliant. i can't wait to tell trav. he will be happy for you.
ReplyDeleteoh and i am about pooped my pants when i saw that whole baby thing.
wait for me please? it might be awhile, but it would be fun, right?!
you will be amazazing!!!
ReplyDeletei almost pooped my pants too!
i walked out halfway through my dance audition yesterday...
let's all go back and live together? well... near each other =)
That's the way to live. Have a plan, but be flexible for (inevitable) change. Massage School will be fabulous!! I'm excited for you!
ReplyDeleteI was so excited Collette you totally burst my Aunt bubble, no more fake outs my heart can't take it! Really I am glad you decided to change your major, none of my plans have ever worked the way I wanted and I realized I am way better off the way I am and the way things are!
ReplyDeleteLove ya!
well you know what they say...the best plan is to not have a plan..you cannot plan to be happy...
ReplyDelete"What is the use of planning to be able to eat next week unless I can really enjoy the meals when they come? If I am so busy planning how to eat next week that I cannot fully enjoy what I am eating now, I will be in the same predicament when next week’s meals become 'now.'
If my happiness at this moment consists largely in reviewing happy memories and expectations, I am but dimly aware of this present. I shall still be dimly aware of the present when the good things that I have been expecting come to pass. For I shall have formed a habit of looking behind and ahead, making it difficult for me to attend to the here and now. If, then, my awareness of the past and future makes me less aware of the present, I must begin to wonder whether I am actually living in the real world.
After all, the future is quite meaningless and unimportant unless, sooner or later, it is going to become the present. Thus to plan for a future which is not going to become present is hardly more absurd than to plan for a future which, when it comes to me, will find me 'absent,' looking fixedly over it’s shoulder instead of into its face."